Hi everyone, welcome back to Fiscal Friday. This is Bess Byers, on location in Washington DC. Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, which got me thinking… Politics is a lot like dating. They tell you what you want to hear, and it usually ends up with someone getting screwed, but on that rare occasion you’ll find a special gem true to their word. So today we’re doing a date or dump of American politics.
DATE: California Representative Darrell Issa is a reformed bad boy, making him a definite date. Issa is a high school dropout who got arrested at 19 for stealing a Maserati, but he turned his life around and served in the military as a bomb squad tech. Issa currently serves as the Chairman of the House Oversight and Government reform committee. He opposes taxpayer funded bailouts for Wall Street, has identified billions in potential taxpayer savings and works to make the government more transparent. Dear Darrell, please be mine.
DUMP: IRS Commissioner John Koskinen gets a dump. This weasel is known for backtracking statements and omitting information. On Wednesday he admitted illegal immigrants who didn’t pay taxes will be able to claim back-refunds under President Obama’s temporary amnesty. Koskinen refused to comply with the IRS investigation targeting conservative nonprofits and Lois Lerner’s missing emails. Additionally he advised the IRS budget cut could delay tax your refunds, but doesn’t mention the $3.3 billion in back taxes owed by federal government employees. This guy is worse than a Tinder date.
DATE: Mia Love is the first black female Republican in Congress, but that’s not why we love her. She supports eliminating the death tax, proposes a simpler tax code and opposes increases in capital gains taxes. Love says, “Americans should be rewarded for their hard work… Higher taxes slow economic growth and discourage personal savings.” Preach!
DUMP: I’m always suspect of a man who’s orange, but that’s not why Speaker John Boehner is on our dump list. His trillion dollar Omnibus Spending Bill increased spending by $26 billion, and included $9 billion in unrequested military money. He’s threatened to punish Republicans who cross him and recently suggested Senate Democrats “get off their ass.” You stay classy Boehner.
DATE: Former Congressman Dr. Ron Paul is the ultimate date. This BAE waged a long and public war with the Federal Reserve, with the goal to audit, then end the central bank. He favors a ten-percent reduction in the federal workforce and ending taxes on personal savings. Dr. Paul’s anti-war message is popular on both sides. With a military budget 55% of our discretionary spending, he believes military intervention is not the role of the American taxpayer. (Ugh, swoon)
DUMP: After six years, President Barack Obama gets a dump. He’s like that longterm boyfriend with a great smile and cool demeanor, but he bends the truth so can’t be trusted. At his recent DHS speech, Obama claimed to lower the deficit by 3/4’s. However, he didn’t mention doubling our national debt. He’s called $9 trillion unpatriotic while producing a budget that adds $10 trillion to our debt. His healthcare plan adds an additional $1 trillion to our debt and promises another trillion dollar bailout of the healthcare industry. Obama is cheating on taxpayers and is the ultimate SUS boy.
Looking for a fiscally conservative, dateable Valentine? Subtle pitch, I’m single. (winks) I like CrossFit, cats, and deep political discussions. We’ll be at ISFLC this weekend, so stay tuned for more DC adventures. This is Bess Byers, signing off, and remember, it’s your generation and you’re empowered!